Me Time For Mums
There’s a ton of information out there on ‘how self care works’, or what ‘me time for mums’ is, and what it looks like.
But the reality is that many mums don’t have it.
Whether you’re a stay at home mum, a work from home mum or a work away mum, time is tight (or none existent, let’s face it).
But what if you could change the reality of what ‘me time’ is?
Away from all the glamorised feeds and bullsh*t social media posts which promise this and that?
It may sound a bit woo-woo (and I love woo-woo!) but bare with me here. Keep reading lovely!
In this post I’ll share with you my best tips for me time as a mum.
You gotta be committed to getting it – that’s the truth (me time, I mean), and it’s absolutely possible to do. I promise!
Me Time For Mums – What Is It?
Let’s start by covering what ‘me time’ is not.
Me time doesn’t mean exuberant spa days, pamper sessions, or spending long days relaxing in the bath with sparkly candles and lotions (as nice as it would be…)
The thing is, mums are so busy, yet acts of self care are still possible.
I’m a passionate mum of two young boys, a 3 month old toddler and a 1 year old toddler.
And since I became a mum, I re-termed what ‘me time’ or ‘self care actually means to me.
Self care, (as defined by the Oxford dictionary), is “The practice of taking action to preserve or improve one’s own health.”
Therefore, self care, when I read this definition, can include anything that nourishes me rather than depletes me.
Choosing healthy and energising foods to eat perhaps? Or taking a 5 minute guided meditation?
Perhaps closing your eyes for 30 seconds to ground yourself in the moment?
A walk outside in the fresh air, or allowing yourself to sit with a cuppa and put a movie on in the background instead of vacuuming for the 10th time today.
Here’s a few more ‘me time’ ideas for you.
Positive self talk
Again, not something you’d usually associate with me time, but it’s so important. When you look in the mirror, what does your head say?
I bet it’s “God, look at those rolls. Just LOOK at those stretch marks!”
OK, It’s time to change that narrative.
Your incredible body just did a miracle act!
You’ve nourished and birthed a baby.
So be gentle on your body and forgive yourself for not looking like a catwalk model.
At least three times a day, go to the mirror and tell yourself how well you’re doing. Tell yourself how great you look. Tell yourself how proud you are of yourself. Remind yourself of what went right today and what you’ve done well.
Say “I love you!” or ” I care about you!” in the mirror because you darn well deserve to.
The more you practise doing this, the more you’ll start to believe it, and belief is everything.
Evening time
The kids do sleep… eventually. Evenings are therefore the best ‘me time’ slot in my opinion.
The peace at night, when everyone else is in bed, is blissful.
Run yourself a nice hot bath and sink in. I can’t recommend enough these gorgeous natural bath salts which have healing properties in.
Bath Salts Muscle Soak - Made in UK (450g) Natural Dead Sea Salts for Women, Men, Girls and Kids. Luxury Detox with Essential Oils Mums deserve the best in bath salts if you ask me.
These beauties are filling my bathroom with gorgeous aromas this week. Enjoy!
Also, give yourself an hour before bed without your phone. Read a nice book or talk to your partner. Avoiding the harsh light from your phone will help you sleep better too.
Morning Time
If you’re naturally a morning person (lucky you!) then your early mornings will already be ‘me time’ I’m sure!
However, if you’re not, then why not try making the most of the quiet time first thing?
Set your alarm an hour or so earlier than you normally get up. Use this time wisely, to invest in yourself. Perhaps take the dog for an early walk or start a journaling practise.
You can also use this time to prepare yourself mentally for the day ahead. What do you have on your to-do list?
Any appointments to make? Meals to cook? What can you prepare ahead?
I was never a good planning person before I became a mum, but now I live for my Clever Fox organiser!
Clever Fox Planner - Weekly & Monthly Planner to Increase Productivity, Time Management and Hit Your Goals - Organizer, Gratitude Journal - Undated, Start Anytime, A5, Lasts 1 Year, Turquoise (Wee... This is how I keep track of all my to-do's in life and around the home. Can't function without it!
Daily Fresh Air
Grab the pram and go for a walk regardless what the weather’s doing outside. That’s why we have raincoats!
There is no better time to get some head space than a mid day stroll – if your children are tiny you could always pop on some headphones and listen to something nice.
Or, simply allow yourself to float away in nature by practising some mindfulness.
Really focus on the beauty of the trees, the noise of the wind, and the feeling of the air as you breathe in and out.
Even better, if you’ve got your partner at home to watch the baby, go for a walk on your own. Time out will do you a world of good.
Socialising
Toddler groups and mummy meet ups are something I couldn’t live without.
I enjoy the feeling of my boys being entertained and happy, but equally, I use it as my time to bond and connect with other women and friends.
If you’re feeling somewhat self conscious or afraid to socialise, try starting small scale – just meet an old friend for a walk in the park and go from there.
It’s so easy to fall into the ‘mummy head’ when you’re alone at home with the kids, so go gentle on yourself, don’t force anything, take it easy and break into socialising gradually.
Sleep
Sleep is so underrated! I can’t live without it personally.
If you’re anything like me though, you’ll think you need to clean the house or tidy the toys as priority?
You’ll be so determined not to sleep even if you can, because there’s so much other stuff to do too, right?
I believe what’s best for new mums, and any mums with young kids (or older kids lol!) is to sleep.
Sleep sleep sleep. If you can sleep, do.
Of course, this may not be possible if other children are around, but even a 2 minute rest here and there does wonders to help your body have a little more energy during the day.
Sleep is also paramount to preventing mental health challenges such as anxiety spikes and depression.
Doing What You Love
What activities do you love to do, that perhaps you’ve not done much since being a Mum?
Some suggestions:
Knitting and craft making?
Learning a new language?
Writing?
Cooking?
Gardening?
Days out and travelling?
Online courses and workshops?
Working on your own business or side hustle?
During your ‘me time’, make sure that you do more of what you love!
Don’t fall into the trap of flaking on the sofa and scrolling on your feed. By doing more of what you love, you’ll feel more like you, you’ll relax and chill, and you’ll feel more energised.
Just what you need to be a great mum!
Summary
- Sleep
- Socialise
- Fresh air
- Positive self talk
- Evening time
- Morning time
- Doing what you love when you can!
Remember, nothing ever happens the first or second time round – you probably won’t feel a lot of difference doing it for one day.
It’s the commitment to do things over a longer period that will improve how you feel.
By creating ‘me time’ amidst your day to day routine, you’ll really start to feel great.
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